Thinks In Purple

Why wasn't I the one who thought of this?!

Start Wearing Purple

...but as long as it keeps goin' round it's unbelievable.

Today I turn 25 and a half. And the next time Michael Phelps breaks every swimming record, I will be 29 and a half.

Yesterday I met with a realtor. I had sort of an episode yesterday evening. I am incredibly overwhelmed and don't feel grown up enough to buy a home. Yet I am doing it.

This evening I filled out my financing preapproval form. That took way to long and it involved ten to fifteen phone calls to my father.

Through the listings realtor Chris has given me, I have picked my favorites, however the cheaper and newer ones are in the University area. Since I am not a college student anymore, it seems pointless to live there again.

I already knew that I would hate this process and I was right. Just take my money and give me the damn keys. I can barely handle buying things on Ebay let along this.

But I am strapped in, that bar has been pushed down on my lap and the ride is about to start climbing the anticipatory hill of death.

I am angry about a lot things. Angry at myself, at the world and at people in my life. I blame the bathing suit that came in the mail today - where the bottom fits fine, but the top is too big. Dammit if I did not have to participate in ABZ lake days this month and next, I would not have to spend 80 bucks on a bathing suit that does not fit. If stores did not start selling bathing suits in January and stop by August, my back account would not be causing me to lose sleep at night.

I woke this afternoon and ate too much breakfast for a reason I cannot identify at the moment, other than it was just a distraction, which food usually is for me. Then I felt lousy for the rest of the afternoon and into the evening. Then I ate too much again while watching the movie I rented.

My critical part has ruled my day (not to mention my life). I have always talked to myself in a very bad way. "You are a terrible, fat, pathetic mess who does not deserve anything good that comes her way. Just own up to feeling lousy forever because you deserve that. You tried to be skinny your whole life and it's not working, so just be the fat girl forever. Nobody likes fat people anyway and you don't deserve to be liked or even loved at all. You are not saving any money, which means you don't deserve to live in a nice home either. Your mother and father talk to you like that because they have given up on you and just do not give a damn anymore."

If you just think I am wallowing in my own self pity, stop reading. This is how I have always treated myself. I have put too many people first because I felt that I never deserved it and I was not worth it. I have held on to people in my life who are awful because I don't want to feel rejected, and anything bad anybody does to me, I make it my fault and I apologize and I try to fix it. Why the hell would anybody do this to themselves?

...just dance

This is what my babies think about me bringing work home:

Stella builds a fort out of my paperwork.



Sully doesn't care all that much.

Tentative title: "Discarded"

The clients I have to work with on a daily basis are slowly and methodically ripping my soul from my body, throwing it aside like a piece of garbage where it will then be left in the street to die alone in the rain.

Yesterday I worked on two cover designs and two inside spreads as options for the Presbyterian Hospital Foundation Annual Report. Client's response: "I got chill bumps…I love it."


Something to ponder:

The most beautiful scene in the history of musical theatre. If you don't get just a little emotional, then it is official: you are dead inside.

You should see what it is like live.


Thank you Julie Taymore.

I've never been a type a person that thinks all that highly of herself. But over the past few weeks, I have thought highly of myself when it has come to my career as a designer.

When I was in college, I struggled a bit in design. I was never the best in the class. I did the best I could. I had a passion for what I was studying and I tried hard to be good at it. A found a couple of jobs while still in school, graduated, got fired, freelanced, then found a job that was a good fit for me. I've worked there for two years now, and recently was promoted. Yeah that's right, promoted to being the designer that every new designer will go to for initial art direction. That means my superiors value my position and the work that I create.

I'm damn good at my job, and damn proud of it. It has taken me a lot of hard work to get to were I am, and I will keep climbing up the ladder and continue to work hard at what I do. One of the reasons I love design so much is that you never stop learning and discovering new things. It will continue to be a journey for me.

I am usually last to know about the next big thing, but I recently discovered a new band that I love – Tilly and the Wall. The band is comprised of the usual instruments, guitar, drums, etc., but these people have a tap dancer as a part of their percussion. Need I say more?

This morning on my way to work, I was at a stoplight behind a car covered in an array of diverse bumper stickers. After studying them, I came to the conclusion that the woman driving the car was a gay, Canadian, sports-loving hippie teacher who loved old school Apple products.

I have been working too hard lately. So I decided to take the day off yesterday and have a "mental health day" and it was fabulous.

I woke up at a decent hour and worked out for 30 minutes. Then I treated myself to a massage at Zen Charlotte in the morning, which was just what the doctor ordered. You never really think that sitting at a computer all day every day can take a toll on your body.

Then I spent an hour or so sitting by the pool at my apartment complex, which I had all to myself. I actually did get some sun, but it you can't really tell. That's how pale I am.

After lunch, I watched Marie Antoinette (a great movie for unwinding. I just wish I could relax in a garden at Versailles in a ball gown.) Then I was off to Target to buy myself pretty things.

Kim was going to be in town yesterday, so we met for dinner. We went to Rusan's where we sat outside on the patio and enjoyed yummy sushi, plus dessert and alcohol. Kim has a convertible so we spent the remainder of the daylight hours driving around Charlotte with the top down. The weather was absolutely, positively gorgeous. That is why I live here. (Of course when it's 80 degrees in December I want to move to Maine, but that is another story.)

Then we returned to my humble abode to watch Across the Universe, which Kim has not seen and is a better person now for seeing it, and downing a bottle of wine between the two of us. Then we chatted the rest of the night away and I went to bed at around one in them morning. I cannot tell you the last time I went to bed that late.

All in all, a wonderful day that was well deserved and well spent with great food and great company.

If Franz Klein can create Universal Klein Blue, why can't I create my own purple?

I am a big fan of the mini office voodoo kit and the annoy-a-tron

15 Fun Office Toys